Monday, March 10, 2014

School Trip

Rocks jag in and out sharp as sharks jaws.

Gorse spikes dangerously like swords.

The water sways softly.

The girl jumps of the rock her arms splayed out beside

 her like an aeroplane.

9 comments:

Meg said...

Nice poem. Try to use less of the LIKE!!!!!!!

Mahana Kotuku said...

I will like, try to do that-pip

Mahana Kotuku said...

Love your first Line it's great!
From Natalie.

Meg said...

Stop it!

Athena said...

Nice poem I agree with meg less likes

paige said...

someone is going to die pip with that shark

Mahana Kotuku said...

Can u please edit

Mahana Kotuku said...

Pip love your poem it's great but I think it's needs less
Like

Mahana Kotuku said...

thanks Athena-Pip